I’m a closet bi-sexual.
I started masturbating to orgasm and I started
to experiment with nudism by stripping
nude from the waist down and masturbating in my back
yard behind the garage. I found national geographic
for pornographic excitement about the same time.
The lady who lived next door to us used to sunbathe
topless and I’d take peeks through the fence at her,
then masturbate. At the age of 18, when we moved to
another house and I finally got a private room, I
started to strip nude in my bedroom and masturbate
even more often.
Then, whenever my family was out of the house and I
knew I’d have some time alone, I’d strip nude and walk
through the house, it used to turn me on to just be
nude in the living room when I knew it was forbidden
usually.
We moved to another house when I was 19, much smaller,
but I did all the same things and got a bit more daring
with how and when I would go nude. I used to strip
nude in the day when I knew I could be caught, but
thought no one would come in on me. I never did get
caught.
Then, we moved to a hotel room for a while, that was
hell in one way, and great in another, while I lost
all privacy, I used to get to see women at the pool in
next to nothing swimsuits; sometimes hookers would
show up at the motel in next to nothing. Then, during
the summers, I’d go into the pool when no one was their
when there were few cars in the parking lot, and I’d
strip out of my suit while swimming and swim nude, it
was great.
Then we moved to another house; I was back to having
some privacy, and I used it well, I also had a much
more private backyard so, when my family was away,
and the weather was nice, I’d strip nude and sunbathe
in the backyard. It was wonderful.
Then I got to my college years. That’s where I really
began to realize I was a closet bi-sexual.
I found lots of good porno and information on nudist
camps in the library. I also found that the library’s
bathrooms were used for more than I thought.
I got a subscription to playboy and used to take it
into the bathroom and jack off in one of the stalls.
One afternoon, I noted a hole had been punched in the
divider between the two stalls. It got bigger each
day. When it was about quarter sized, I realized it
was probably not just an accident or someone pulling
a screw out of the divider.
I continued to use that stall to jack off in. One
afternoon, I realized I wasn’t the only one jacking
off in the stalls in the bathroom. I could see under
the divider the unmistakable shadow of a hand moving
in the stall next to me.
What shocked and excited me was looking over and seeing
an eye at that hole; looking at me doing the same thing.
The guy wasn’t just jacking off, he was getting excited
looking at my hard cock being jacking off.
I froze… I let my big dick just sit there, he stared
a while longer and I heard the little plops of cum
dropping into the toilet next to me, he flushed and
left.
Soon after, the hole got too big! Guys started giving
blowjobs and anal sex through it, and I stopped using
the bathroom there. It was just too much.
During college, I also got a private mailbox, and
started to answer some of the personal ads in the back
of an alternative newspaper in town. I never met
anyone, but I got some very arousing notes,
particularly from guys.
I used to write to couples, women, gay guys, I also
replied to some ads as a woman, just to see what some
of the couples and guys would write; it was really
amazing how specific they’d get.
I got really turned on one day when a guy wrote back
telling me how he’d like to massage me and play with
my cock and balls before giving me a blowjob. I even
called him and briefly talked to him on the phone; it
was really a turn on.
I talked with a couple of guys I wrote to, but didn’t
meet them. One guy had my interest because he and his
wife were looking for a bi guy to play with. I should
have actually met them, but I didn’t have the guts.
I also started putting ads on phone systems as a bi-guy
looking for other guys or couples.. or as a guy looking
for a woman. I got tons of voice-mail messages.
I finally called one guy back who seemed harmless
enough. He was interested in giving me a blowjob. I
finally agreed to meet him. He sounded okay on the
phone and warned me he lived with a teenager he had to
get out of the house for a while.. he did warn me he
was kinda tall and big, but I didn’t realize he was so
big.
I arrived and my heart was pounding, knocked on the
door and was totally shocked at his size. I went in
anyway, but almost immediately told him I didn’t want
a blow job, just maybe to get jacked off.
He agreed.
We chatted for a while… his apartment was kinda run
down; we watched TV for a bit, then I got up and said
I’d like to get started… so, I stripped nude.
There I was, for the first time in front of some
strange guy — nude — for sexual purposes. It was
great. I sat down next to him on his couch, and he
started stroking my cock. I got hard and came almost
immediately, but he let my cum go everywhere; it
spattered me in the face and hair, strait up, all over
his couch, carpet and even on his cheek.
He enjoyed it, he got up and toweled me off. My first
bi-sexual experience. I stayed nude for a while; he
offered to get nude and jack off, but he was just not
attractive. I got dressed and left.
After the first guy, I waited a year before I did any-
thing like that again. In the meantime, I found the
wonder of getting a massage… It was great because I
could get nude and have someone touch me.
My first massage was great because it was a young,
pretty woman who let me get totally nude and stay
uncovered both front and back for the full hour. It
felt good and she got to look at my cock for the last
half-hour of the massage, then, she gave me a shower;
and she got to see my body up close and personal then
too.
But, I was still interested in cumming with a guy.
I was working nights by this time. I found an ad in
the alternative newspaper for a guy who gave massages.
It looked like a coded message, “are you curious?” was
the headline of the ad so, I called him.
I asked what he meant; he said that I wouldn’t be dis-
appointed. He was right.
I got to his apartment and found him to be obviously
gay; he was wearing a robe and tiger print bikini
underwear. I paid him the 25 dollars up front for the
massage, then went back to the bedroom to strip and
lie down. He came in, took off the robe and began a
great massage.
I could tell he was aroused, but I didn’t touch him.
I let him do all the work. When I rolled over, I had
a hard on. He looked at my cock and said it was very
nice when he was done with the massage, he dripped some
oil on my cock and jacked me off.
He pulled my cock so it was straight up in the air; he
said I was a lot bigger than most guys, I came like a
volcano, straight up and all over.
He wiped me off; it was great.
Shortly after that, I found a female masseuse at a
place I was sure was a front for prostitution. She
asked me discreetly if I wanted a “full” body massage.
I said yes, but didn’t’ understand. I asked her to
explain.
She said it included a “hand release” for a 40-dollar
tip. I told her “not today” but she did let me stay
uncovered; she even got on the table to give me the
massage, all of which was against the rules. But I
didn’t care.
The next time I went, I asked for and got the “hand
release”, she did a very nice job of working the oil
on my dick, and slowly moving her hand over it until
I came.
Unfortunately, she moved away shortly after that and I
never got to get a hand job from her again.
Then, I tried a place that was advertised as “oriental
tan”, basically it was a whorehouse in a shopping
center. I went in after calling ahead for an appoint-
ment… I was led to a private room with a table by a
young lady; she told me to pay the 60 dollar “house”
fee, and I did, then she checked my ID, then she told
me to strip and began giving me a price list.
Her accent was so thick, I didn’t understand. I only
had another 20 bucks on me, so she told me all she
would do was jack me off while topless. She let me
touch her tits, they were very very nice. The first
tits I’d touched. But she did a lousy job at jacking
me off, really fast and hard, and I came quickly and
without much enjoyment. She explained I needed to come
back sometime with more money and we could fuck. Well,
I never went back, that was too much money for me.
After the last experience with the “oriental tan”
place, I realized that paying for sex at a place like
that was just a waste of time and money. Getting a
massage with a hand job was fine because the massage
was always good… but I started to get more into
conversing with people on the BBS and on the phone.
The next guy I talked to was from the computer system.
He was bi-sexual and laid back. I had said I was
interested in receiving anal sex and was looking for
someone with experience who would take their time.
Mainly, I was afraid of getting some over-eager guy who
wanted to literally rape me. Well, this guy was nice,
quiet, said he had some porno we could watch and do
whatever.
So, I went over to his apartment one afternoon. He was
not at all like I expected, he was older than I
thought, short, bald, and fat. We sat and watched
porno of guys, women, 3 ways, orgies etc. It was very
good stuff. I came in my pants, but had no interest in
getting it on with him. I wound up leaving after about
2 hours of pornos.
The next guy offered pretty much the same thing. He
sounded fairly cool, laid back, etc. offered to watch
gay porno with me at his apartment.
So I went over one night after talking with him on the
phone for a while. He was gay; fairly nice looking,
and lived in a nice area of town, actually not too far
from the guy who gave me the jack off after the massage
a year earlier.
Anyway, we watched guys fucking and sucking for a
while… we talked a bit; I was really nervous. But
after a while, he stripped nude. I did the same, and
we sat down and he immediately grabbed my dick.
I was real close to cumming after watching the porno
for a while; I took his hand away and told him to wait
a bit; he got real prissy and told me to leave because
I didn’t know what I wanted, I didn’t get it, but left.
I’m guessing he would have gotten upset if I had cum
on him after a minute of his touching my dick too. Oh
well… probably for the best, he was pretty weird.
The next guy was pretty cool; he was on the computer
as well. he was a California surfer type. I again said
I was interested in finding someone to fuck me… He
said he was interested in anything! He was bi-sexual
and apparently experienced at anything and everything.
After one miscue on hooking up, we got together at his
apartment; we sat in his apartment and talked about
all kinds of things for a while, then we moved into his
bedroom. We both stripped nude; he got some oil out
and gave me a great back massage. He tried to get his
finger in my ass, but it was too tight.
Then we traded places, I gave him a back massage and
rubbed his butt and legs, when I was done with that,
he rolled over, he was really hard. I oiled up his
cock and jacked him off; he touched my cock as I jacked
him off. He came really hard and spewed cum all over
the bed and on my hand. We cleaned up and took a shower
together. The odd thing was, I didn’t cum that after-
noon. I wanted to watch him cum more than anything, and
I did…
The next guy I hooked up with from the computer BBS was
interesting; we talked more than we did anything else.
He was an executive and lived in a nice house, and was
a closet homosexual. Neither of us could let anyone
know we fooled around with guys, so that was okay.
The second time we met was strictly for sex — but…
well… he was just too eager. He really wanted to
fuck me, but he was just too eager. We got nude and
went outside to his hottub.. we played around in his
hot tub for a while, then went back to his bedroom for
a bit.
He tried to get me to suck his dick, then he tried to
suck mine, but I was just not comfortable with him.
So I wound up jacking him off, sort of, but he couldn’t
stay hard for whatever reason. Overall, not a very
satisfying encounter, we parted company and I’ve never
seen him again.
I finally got a bit more daring after that and I
started fooling around a lot more with women after
that…